Monday, August 2, 2010

Receiving life changing news

I have never imagined myself to be someone who would ever receive life changing news; I mean, you read about these stories all the time and you empathise with people who are going through traumas, however you never really understand what they are going through until it happens to you.

Just over three weeks ago, I went to see a GP for my annual doctor visit. The main purpose of my visit was to fulfill an annual prescription, so you can imagine the surprise I got when the GP insisted on doing a breast check; something I have never been offered nor had before. The GP found a lump and asked me to get it checked out as soon as I can.

Two days later, I was at a specialist having a mammogram (and oh yes, they are as awkward as everyone says they are!), ultra sound and then biopsies. I had ducked out of the office believing I was going to be one hour. So focused on getting back to the office within the hour, I realised it was going to take much longer than the hour I envisaged when two hours later, the specialist didn't even look like letting me go! I had no idea what was going through her mind.....I cleared my meetings for the rest of that day.

After all of the needles and prodding (yes I felt like a pin cushion!) I decided to ask the specialist a few more questions. After asking her once innocent question, I got this response;

"Susie, what we are seeing here today is extremely worrying to us which is why we are being so agressive with you today. You have abnormalities that we can see, which are not in line with benign tumours and there is a high chance that when we receive the results tomorrow, it will be confirmed that you have breast cancer"

I was stunned and lost for words. What, how, why...... what does this mean?
The results were confirmed the following day (after I spent the day in the office convincing myself this couldn't be possible) that I had multi focal breast cancer. I broke down and felt like my entire world had come crashing down on top of me....

This was the beginning of what I didn't realise would become a life changing journey for me....

5 comments:

  1. Dearest Susie, Simon L has just forward this link to me and I am choking back the tears. We all remember the fun we had with you in your RHP days. I hardly know what to say to bring any comfort or support, please get well, with or without hair, boobs or whatever you are lovely and we all want you to concentrate on getting better. We will follow your blog so please keep writing. linda melville cyan Lx

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  2. Susie,
    I've hardly slept all night because I'm so blown away at how FULLY amazing you are. FULLY!!! I'm sure I've told you, but two people in my 'family' have been on the cancer trip in the last few years. Their ignorance and inability to communicate their problems has been the greatest downfall they could have. YOU are such a breath of fresh air! I'm so proud that you are armed with the things you need more than anything - information and confidence!! YAY!!!! You are such a winner!
    Sure, there's some big changes to adjust to, but it's times like these that your REAL self shines through- and you couldn't be any luckier. Especially with the gorgeous Matt and your family right by your side!!
    VERY BEST LOVE
    SOOOOO proud of you! xx
    e
    xxx

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  3. Dear Susie
    Many will be encouraged, inspired and helped by your blog including yours truly. joano xxx

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  4. Hi Suse. Having known you since birth , I know you are to be the one who will put all effort into this to inform people and to improve awareness about this "silent" disease, in so much as you have said, " I didn't think it is a worry', or such, but it really does need people to step up and realize that none of us are infallible,..and I personally have been slack in this area....not having regular checks etc at all.I give you my love and best wishes and know you will enlighten a lot of people. Regards to Matty and I hope to see you soon.XXXOOO Joy

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  5. Hi Susie, i have just read your journal after hearing from Barbs. As your friends and family have no doubtedly told you many a time before... the susie i remember is strong, full of life and totally dedicated to getting what she wants in life.. I think this will be no different Susie... I have faith (only just rediscoverd this not long ago - after losing Emma) that you will get thru this.. and i am sending you big hugs and kisses.. Stay strong and take care Luve Trish

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