Two weeks in from chemo 5, I have nearly fully recovered! It has been a long and slow recovery this time round; can you believe that I still have the bruise in my arm from where the needle went in? (that said, it took four times for the needle to go in successfully last time!!!).
I have suffered a bit this week as I got my first infection, which was an interesting experience. I had what I thought was a very simple blister on my heel, which has turned into an infection after I went for a short walk last week....... who would ever have thought that a blister could turn into a very painful infection! My immune system was clearly very low as I didn't have the white cells to repair the skin (which would normally happen in your sleep after some foot cream!).... and as a result, I haven't been able to stand on my foot for most of the week as it's been extremely painful. I took antibiotics and kept it bandaged up so it has improved throughout the week and I am now able to stand on it and walk in my sandals......while I'm sure the rest has been much appreciated by my body, it has been a very frustrating and challenging recovery for me as I'm not the best person to be told to sit still for two whole weeks. But I had to learn very quickly that I shouldn't get frustrated and fight it; I should rest up and appreciate the time I have to sit still!!! (yes I did actually think that!).
I was watching an ABC programme this week about happiness and one of the best insights for me came when the expert was discussing emotions.... he said that in order to feel true happiness, you need to have experienced the full spectrum of emotions - from sadness, grief, loss etc to excitement, laughter & love etc..... now I have always felt that I am extremely lucky to have had such a fabulous life; how many people get to have experienced living on the other side of the world, career success and a life filled with amazingly loving and caring friends and family....... that said, now that I have felt and experienced so much grief, loss and illness, I think that my perspective on life has definitely changed for the better over the past few months. I don't think anyone can ever imagine what it's like to wake up and not feel well enough to get out of bed, shower and do simple things...... and don't worry, neither could I just a few months ago. But now, if I feel well, I am instantly happy every morning as it feels like a massive bonus to feel well.......imagine how excited I will feel when I'm back to full health!
There have been lots of little things that have really helped me to feel happy including:
Listening to music - downloading new songs from iTunes each week (at the moment, I am a big fan of the Jay Z/Alicia Keys Sex in the City Soundtrack - it rocks)
Reading novels - I have had so many friends send me some fabulous books which I have been reading constantly and they have given me a true escapism - so thank you so much to everyone who has sent me these.....and on bad days, magazines are great too......
Cooking - I've been given some great recipes from friends and it has been great fun to experiment in the kitchen using non wheat, dairy, soy and gluten recipes..... "what can you eat" I hear you asking!!! We got a new juicer last night so that will be great fun to experiment with....
Baths - I've never been a big fan of having a bath, but I have loved having the time to do this over the past few months - grab a book or magazine, get the iPod cranking and it's the perfect remedy to feel better
Unleashing your creativity - yes I have loved learning how to knit and sew over the past few months and there is no doubt this has really helped me to feel good and happy.... especially now that I have an entire room dedicated to it..... who knows, it may be the start of something new.... but it has been great fun and I've loved every minute of it.... AND for those of you who thought knitting was for Nannas, apparently it's massive in London and young women now have knitting parties!
Walking/pilates/yoga- prior to my treatment, I ran most days, however, I have not been able to do much running at all, which at first was devastating to me.... but I quickly discovered there is nothing better than getting out in the fresh air and going for a nice walk, especially around our hilly streets! I think this has made a massive difference to my wellbeing as the happiness it brings me to get outside and walk has been huge. I have also loved learning pilates and yoga too; two classes I would never have gone to previously as they were not high energy enough! Boy, how times change.
My blog - I embarked on this project to keep all of my friends around the world updated on what is happening as well as to inspire and educate other cancer patients..... I had no idea how it would evolve and I did feel anxious about revealing all of my inner thoughts and feelings at first but now, I realise that all of the love and support I've received back from it, has helped me soooooo much to get through this journey. It has been a great outlet to unleash my feelings and I look forward to the day I can go back and have a look at my early entries - I'm sure it will help to keep my new perspective on life very fresh! I also hope it has helped people to learn more about their bodies and be more conscious of the things we put into them; if I have impacted on one person, that is a great feeling for me.
I almost cannot believe that I'm back at chemo next Friday (26th). It has come around so quickly but I am also extremely excited that after next Friday, I only have two treatments to go.... my gosh, the end is so in my sight!
I am also going back to work part time after my next treatment which is really exciting. It feels like a distant memory to be in the routine of working each day but I am looking forward to seeing everyone in my team again and feeling very proud of everything they have achieved over the past four months.
Well it is Saturday morning and my good week end so I'm off to enjoy it! I wish you all a really wonderful week end too!
xxx
Friday, November 19, 2010
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Post Chemo 5
I'm not sure where to begin with this post........ it's been a bit of a crazy week and I have found out that a girl I went to primary school with has just been diagnosed with breast cancer and is about to start chemo in two weeks...... I vividly remember reading other blogs before I started chemo and to be frank, I found them depressing! I could never have imagined feeling so terrible and down about anything so I really didn't believe I would ever be in that space......... but then the reality of chemo one hit!
So I always try to write my blog so that it doesn't scare people who are about to start chemo..... but I have to say that this week, it's difficult to do that because chemo is hard and it is like no other feeling you have ever felt before (or that you'll feel ever again hopefully). My biggest resolve is that if I can get through this, I can do ANYTHING! I don't think any other life challenge will quite compare to eight rounds of chemotherapy. And five times into it, I am still astounded at how the human body bounces back from feeling completely depleted to pretty good in a fairly short space of time.
It's really great that I have now had five out of eight sessions but this was the first of the new drug (Docetaxel) and I had heard it was much easier than my previous drugs...... in essence, whoever said this was lying!
After chemo on Monday, I woke up on Tuesday pinching myself as I felt so good and normal that I couldn't believe that I had had chemo!!! I was over the moon....... then Wednesday came........
I woke up feeling terrible..... I spent the entire day in bed sleeping; which I have never done before after any treatment! Every bit of energy had been sapped from my body, my head was muddy and I was so fatigued like never before. I was taking high doses of supplements but they didn't make a huge difference like they had with the previous treatments..... I saw Ben (my kineso) on Thursday and he adjusted my supplement doses and gave me the equivalent of 100 folic acid tablets (he said he's only ever given one other person this dosage) and upped my doses of everything else......
One of the side effects of the new chemo drug is aching bones.... my god, I felt every single bone in my body ache and ache yesterday - from my elbows to my knees, it was painful! There is a high chance of chemo patients developing osteoporosis so I am trying to keep as active as possible to avoid this happening..... all I can say is if this is a taste of what osteo feels like, I never want to develop it!
Today is Friday and I'm feeling slightly better but I have to say that I don't feel like chemo is getting any easier; and three more of the same sounds like a massive challenge to me right now! I consider myself to be a pretty strong person and each time, I find that it takes every bit of energy to pull me back into a positive mindset........
I have realised this week how lucky I have been to have Matt here at home with me up until now, helping me every step of the way to get through it...... I REALLY feel for people who are doing the treatment alone as it is one long and lonely journey; especially through the dark days and moments......
But I stay focused on all of the amazing things we have to look forward to, especially our wedding..... on some days, I dream about simple things like getting into my jeans and heels and going to a bar for a glass of champagne or going out for a nice dinner....... oh I will never take these outings we enjoyed regularly for granted again!
Come January, there is no doubt I will be the happiest person in the world. While this journey has taught me so much about myself, I never want to be on it again.......
Bring on 2011!
xx
So I always try to write my blog so that it doesn't scare people who are about to start chemo..... but I have to say that this week, it's difficult to do that because chemo is hard and it is like no other feeling you have ever felt before (or that you'll feel ever again hopefully). My biggest resolve is that if I can get through this, I can do ANYTHING! I don't think any other life challenge will quite compare to eight rounds of chemotherapy. And five times into it, I am still astounded at how the human body bounces back from feeling completely depleted to pretty good in a fairly short space of time.
It's really great that I have now had five out of eight sessions but this was the first of the new drug (Docetaxel) and I had heard it was much easier than my previous drugs...... in essence, whoever said this was lying!
After chemo on Monday, I woke up on Tuesday pinching myself as I felt so good and normal that I couldn't believe that I had had chemo!!! I was over the moon....... then Wednesday came........
I woke up feeling terrible..... I spent the entire day in bed sleeping; which I have never done before after any treatment! Every bit of energy had been sapped from my body, my head was muddy and I was so fatigued like never before. I was taking high doses of supplements but they didn't make a huge difference like they had with the previous treatments..... I saw Ben (my kineso) on Thursday and he adjusted my supplement doses and gave me the equivalent of 100 folic acid tablets (he said he's only ever given one other person this dosage) and upped my doses of everything else......
One of the side effects of the new chemo drug is aching bones.... my god, I felt every single bone in my body ache and ache yesterday - from my elbows to my knees, it was painful! There is a high chance of chemo patients developing osteoporosis so I am trying to keep as active as possible to avoid this happening..... all I can say is if this is a taste of what osteo feels like, I never want to develop it!
Today is Friday and I'm feeling slightly better but I have to say that I don't feel like chemo is getting any easier; and three more of the same sounds like a massive challenge to me right now! I consider myself to be a pretty strong person and each time, I find that it takes every bit of energy to pull me back into a positive mindset........
I have realised this week how lucky I have been to have Matt here at home with me up until now, helping me every step of the way to get through it...... I REALLY feel for people who are doing the treatment alone as it is one long and lonely journey; especially through the dark days and moments......
But I stay focused on all of the amazing things we have to look forward to, especially our wedding..... on some days, I dream about simple things like getting into my jeans and heels and going to a bar for a glass of champagne or going out for a nice dinner....... oh I will never take these outings we enjoyed regularly for granted again!
Come January, there is no doubt I will be the happiest person in the world. While this journey has taught me so much about myself, I never want to be on it again.......
Bring on 2011!
xx
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Soothing The Soul During Chemo
It's the day of treatment number five, and I am VERY excited about being able to say that I only have three treatments to go after today; it now really feels like I'm on the home stretch which is a big achievement given where I was after the first couple of treatments.
My health over the past couple of weeks has continued to be good and so much better than every other treatment so far, so chemo for me is definitely getting easier! Many people ask whether you get worse as the treatment goes on as your immune system is operating at about 30% and for me, with the help of a strict new diet and lots of probiotic supplements, I am surprising myself at how my body is bouncing back and tackling the treatment.
After reaching the half way milestone, my beautiful partner Matt got a new job, so we have taken some time out to have a holiday together before he starts today. For me, it was really great to get away and forget about breast cancer and chemo for a few days and to feel like a normal person again! We had an AMAZING break and I really encourage anyone going through chemo to take time out to go away and treat yourself........in fact we had such a great time that I have forgotten what the feeling of chemo is like......... so it is true; holidays soothe the soul!
My new diet with no wheat, dairy, soy or gluten is going well and I have really not found the adjustment difficult at all. Yes, we need to be more organised than before and take a few supplies with us but overall, I really feel that our diet now is how everyone should be eating all of the time. The focus is very much on meat, veges, salad and fruit and my body is feeling so much better for it! For snacks, I can eat nuts, fruit, avocado on corn bread or any home made treats (with potato, buckwheat or rice flour).
If I do fancy a treat, thai and indian cuisines are best for me as they have a base of coconut milk and I can eat rice! So there are many many options and I am enjoying the response my body has been giving me since the change. I really believe this and all the other advice my kinesiologist has given me will lead to a long and healthy existence!
A friend who has had cancer very kindly sent me a product which he believes helped to cure him. It's imported from the US and is called Mona Vie. It is a blend of the Brazilian Acai berry - a superfood- and 18 other beneficial fruits. It's great to experiment with new products like this so I will take it for a few days, see how I feel and also take it to my kineso to get tested! (thanks Glenn!)
So today my drugs change and they are supposed to be much easier than the ones I've had before...... I can only hope that tonight, tomorrow and the next week brings me good health and that I continue to feel good and strong during treatment. I am pretty confident this will happen although I am feeling a little nervous.
It has been so great to forget about cancer and chemo during this treatment and I am feeling so much happier that I'm another step closer to defeating this disease and getting back to living a normal life. I am hopefully going to be well enough to return to work part time next week which is very exciting - (I have forgotten what dressing up in skirts and heels feels like, so Alannah I'm back very soon!!!)..... thank goodness I've been keeping the brain as active as I can and my boss and team have been keeping me in the loop with the happenings in the office so I am looking forward to going back.
So after today, FIVE down and THREE to go....... what an amazing feeling!
xxx
My health over the past couple of weeks has continued to be good and so much better than every other treatment so far, so chemo for me is definitely getting easier! Many people ask whether you get worse as the treatment goes on as your immune system is operating at about 30% and for me, with the help of a strict new diet and lots of probiotic supplements, I am surprising myself at how my body is bouncing back and tackling the treatment.
After reaching the half way milestone, my beautiful partner Matt got a new job, so we have taken some time out to have a holiday together before he starts today. For me, it was really great to get away and forget about breast cancer and chemo for a few days and to feel like a normal person again! We had an AMAZING break and I really encourage anyone going through chemo to take time out to go away and treat yourself........in fact we had such a great time that I have forgotten what the feeling of chemo is like......... so it is true; holidays soothe the soul!
My new diet with no wheat, dairy, soy or gluten is going well and I have really not found the adjustment difficult at all. Yes, we need to be more organised than before and take a few supplies with us but overall, I really feel that our diet now is how everyone should be eating all of the time. The focus is very much on meat, veges, salad and fruit and my body is feeling so much better for it! For snacks, I can eat nuts, fruit, avocado on corn bread or any home made treats (with potato, buckwheat or rice flour).
If I do fancy a treat, thai and indian cuisines are best for me as they have a base of coconut milk and I can eat rice! So there are many many options and I am enjoying the response my body has been giving me since the change. I really believe this and all the other advice my kinesiologist has given me will lead to a long and healthy existence!
A friend who has had cancer very kindly sent me a product which he believes helped to cure him. It's imported from the US and is called Mona Vie. It is a blend of the Brazilian Acai berry - a superfood- and 18 other beneficial fruits. It's great to experiment with new products like this so I will take it for a few days, see how I feel and also take it to my kineso to get tested! (thanks Glenn!)
So today my drugs change and they are supposed to be much easier than the ones I've had before...... I can only hope that tonight, tomorrow and the next week brings me good health and that I continue to feel good and strong during treatment. I am pretty confident this will happen although I am feeling a little nervous.
It has been so great to forget about cancer and chemo during this treatment and I am feeling so much happier that I'm another step closer to defeating this disease and getting back to living a normal life. I am hopefully going to be well enough to return to work part time next week which is very exciting - (I have forgotten what dressing up in skirts and heels feels like, so Alannah I'm back very soon!!!)..... thank goodness I've been keeping the brain as active as I can and my boss and team have been keeping me in the loop with the happenings in the office so I am looking forward to going back.
So after today, FIVE down and THREE to go....... what an amazing feeling!
xxx
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Half Way Bombshell!
My first week post chemo has continued to be much more bearable than the previous times, thanks to my kinesiologist....... however, I wasn't feeling so great on Tuesday - my body temperature was fluctuating constantly and I was having hot flushes all throughout the night, so I went to see my kineso on Tuesday evening to see if there was anything he could do for me. He was actually all booked up so I saw his dad instead (he assured me that he'd learnt everything from his dad) who has an excellent reputation across Australia.
He did a muscle test first up and confirmed that everything is terrible, so that was a relief as that is how I was feeling!!! He then started testing some food substances and began with wheat (which we had tested before but we thought it was ok) and sure enough, it reacted badly........ in fact I could feel the pain in key places after I put it on my tongue and funnily enough I had deteriorated that afternoon and guess what I had for lunch? pasta!!!
He then tested rye, gluten and oats and all of these reacted badly also! So I am now officially a nightmare to prepare any food for....... it makes me dairy, soy, wheat and gluten intolerant!!! So my life as a passionate foodie is officially over! I am pretty well much confined to fruit, vege and meat.....(but I'm sure that between us, we will come up with a few recipes for treats!!!)
I was really upset at first, however I do realise that I am one of the very few people who has a very sensitive internal system so if it means that I live a long, healthy and cancer free life, then it's a no brainer really.....
I'm not sure if I have reported on this yet but there are over 60 pesticide substances that have already been banned in the UK that we are still using in Australia so we are way behind the rest of the world in this area. This means that we need to preferably buy organic or wash everything before we eat it very thoroughly. It is quite scary that my oncologist has said that the cancer has been growing inside me for at least two years... and this coincides with the time (or is just after) we moved back from the UK about two and a half years ago..... I think they are all signs that we need to be extra careful about what we put in our bodies and I have been SO encouraged by the number of our friends who have changed their eating habits and started looking into the best way to buy fresh food...
The kineso also put me on high doses of folic acid tablets, which have immediately kicked in and made me feel so much better..... so I am very confident that we have the right doses of supplements post chemo now and hopefully this will continue to help me tremendously for the last four sessions.
We tested all of my beauty products last week, so I thought it may be helpful to document which products tested ok and which ones didn't.
Good Products:
Clinique liquid foundation
Crystal Deodorant (however, the body shop's fragrant free roll on deodorant tested ok too even though it has aluminium in it)
Aesop - Rind concentrate body balm
Aesop - Rejuvenate Aromatique body balm
Aesop - Geranium Leaf body balm
The Body Shop - Aloe body lotion
Kiehl's - Creme de Corps
Lancome - Renergie Morpholift
Sanctuary - Pro-Collagen Night Concentrate
Bad Products
Benefit - Bathina (body lotion)
Sanctuary - rich rejuvenating moisturiser
All Lanolin based moisturisers/body lotions we tested
Bloom Organics - nourishing hand cream
It was interesting that many of the organic/natural products actually tested negatively.... remembering that everyone is different so you should get them tested on your own body.....but it has been very helpful to me.
So we are not even at the one week post chemo mark and I am feeling better and stronger every day.... I have been very good and rested all week and it is paying dividends for me now.... this is the best I've felt within a week post chemo.... so let the positive and wellness vibes continue!!
xx
He did a muscle test first up and confirmed that everything is terrible, so that was a relief as that is how I was feeling!!! He then started testing some food substances and began with wheat (which we had tested before but we thought it was ok) and sure enough, it reacted badly........ in fact I could feel the pain in key places after I put it on my tongue and funnily enough I had deteriorated that afternoon and guess what I had for lunch? pasta!!!
He then tested rye, gluten and oats and all of these reacted badly also! So I am now officially a nightmare to prepare any food for....... it makes me dairy, soy, wheat and gluten intolerant!!! So my life as a passionate foodie is officially over! I am pretty well much confined to fruit, vege and meat.....(but I'm sure that between us, we will come up with a few recipes for treats!!!)
I was really upset at first, however I do realise that I am one of the very few people who has a very sensitive internal system so if it means that I live a long, healthy and cancer free life, then it's a no brainer really.....
I'm not sure if I have reported on this yet but there are over 60 pesticide substances that have already been banned in the UK that we are still using in Australia so we are way behind the rest of the world in this area. This means that we need to preferably buy organic or wash everything before we eat it very thoroughly. It is quite scary that my oncologist has said that the cancer has been growing inside me for at least two years... and this coincides with the time (or is just after) we moved back from the UK about two and a half years ago..... I think they are all signs that we need to be extra careful about what we put in our bodies and I have been SO encouraged by the number of our friends who have changed their eating habits and started looking into the best way to buy fresh food...
The kineso also put me on high doses of folic acid tablets, which have immediately kicked in and made me feel so much better..... so I am very confident that we have the right doses of supplements post chemo now and hopefully this will continue to help me tremendously for the last four sessions.
We tested all of my beauty products last week, so I thought it may be helpful to document which products tested ok and which ones didn't.
Good Products:
Clinique liquid foundation
Crystal Deodorant (however, the body shop's fragrant free roll on deodorant tested ok too even though it has aluminium in it)
Aesop - Rind concentrate body balm
Aesop - Rejuvenate Aromatique body balm
Aesop - Geranium Leaf body balm
The Body Shop - Aloe body lotion
Kiehl's - Creme de Corps
Lancome - Renergie Morpholift
Sanctuary - Pro-Collagen Night Concentrate
Bad Products
Benefit - Bathina (body lotion)
Sanctuary - rich rejuvenating moisturiser
All Lanolin based moisturisers/body lotions we tested
Bloom Organics - nourishing hand cream
It was interesting that many of the organic/natural products actually tested negatively.... remembering that everyone is different so you should get them tested on your own body.....but it has been very helpful to me.
So we are not even at the one week post chemo mark and I am feeling better and stronger every day.... I have been very good and rested all week and it is paying dividends for me now.... this is the best I've felt within a week post chemo.... so let the positive and wellness vibes continue!!
xx
Friday, October 15, 2010
Half Way Milestone!
It's Saturday morning, day one post chemo four and here I am for the second time feeling pretty ok...... much to my relief and overwhelming joy.
Yesterday marked a really significant achievement for me as I can now say that I'm half way. YAH! I was super excited to reach this point, so I can only imagine what it will be like for me to get to Xmas when I will only have ONE to go! I will be beside myself with excitement.
We had a really good week this week and I was feeling strong; I even did 6kms at the gym on Wednesday..... and felt pretty good afterwards. Matty and I dressed up for the big milestone occasion yesterday; I wore jeans, my wig AND a hat (it's a far cry from my beautiful Alannah Hill wardrobe which has been lying dormant for the past few months but far dressier than the cargos, jumper and hat I usually cobble together) and my goal was not to cry during chemo for the first time....(trust me, that is a big goal!). Everyone in the chemo area is far older than me and we always look completely out of place when we sit there so it is rather a depressing environment.
I spent the morning creating one of my new product lines (pics below) and was totally in the creative zone. I then realised the time so raced to get my blood test before leaving for the hospital. We arrived a little late and while I had that nauseous feeling in my stomach as soon as we entered the car park, I was far more relaxed about it this time round than ever before, so I was confident I could do it without crying (and it's not just a few tears normally; it's a good 20min sob while poor Matty has to calm me down!!!). That was until the nurse put the needle into my wrist for the first time and failed..... then tried another vein in the back of my hand and failed at that too.... then I asked her if someone else could do it; seeing that she was getting stressed which was making me feel anxious! The second attempt REALLY hurt me so I didn't want her coming near me again.... thankfully she found the lovely man who usually does it for me and he got it right first go.... (thank you Ralph!) so I got through that without any tears and I was proud of myself.
I was very excited to see the first drug go into my body (it's a red liquid which instantly makes me feel terrible) for the last time....... we had a mini celebration at the end of that; there were high fives all round! Then I sat and the second drug was injected, which takes about one hour.... but boy it was a great feeling to say good riddance to these two drugs! The next four treatments will involve only one drug and it's apparently a lot easier than these ones..... a very exciting thought.
I decided to take a big dose of Grape Seed tablets before I went in yesterday and when I saw Ben (kineso) straight afterwards, he said I was much better this time than after the last chemo session...... I felt ok too as normally I get really sick very quickly... so I was hopeful! He dosed me up and I had loads of pills last night and I am feeling remarkably ok today, so I'm soooooo happy! It was definitely a good plan to take them before chemo.
My blood test results were excellent yesterday much to my delight. My white blood cells were higher than what they were before chemo 2 (4.5), so I was thrilled (also because I don't need to have the self injection this time round). My red blood cell count went down by 2-3 which is nothing, so I was also really pleased about that. It confirmed that all of my dietary changes and supplements are making a massive difference.
One of the really strange things that happened yesterday was that I have had a sore eye for the past few days. I think I was getting a bit of a sty on it, however, it was amazing that about 30mins into chemo I noticed that it had really eased and by last night it was gone! That's how powerful chemo is; it kills anything and everything inside your body!
I have such relief and hope today and I'm now past the worst of this experience...... while I've had to make massive dietary changes and really dedicate myself to getting well, it is so worth it after reaching this milestone. Not a day goes by where I don't think myself SOOOO lucky that I found Ben, my kineso, as I have no doubt that he has made a massive difference to my health and at the same time, he has been so kind and generous with his time as he has wanted me to feel better each and every day.... so for that, I am forever grateful. Like all of my specialist doctors, he is truly amazing! I am still so touched by these people who dedicate their lives to helping others. Everyone I've come into contact with (including my GP who originally diagnosed me who still calls me every few weeks) has been so kind hearted, caring and brilliant at what they do.... I'm sure it has made this journey so much easier for me....
I can also reflect at this point on all of the love and kindness from all of you; my friends, family and supporters....... there hasn't been a day where I don't get at least a few emails, texts, phone calls and I cannot tell you just how much this has boosted me each and every day.... I have never felt so loved and cherished in my life and it is so amazing to have so many beautifully kind and caring people in my life..... I haven't always had the chance to call everyone back but I really appreciate every single message; they always bring a massive smile to my face! THANK YOU and I love you all!!!
Now for the fun stuff..... Joey and I are still going strong with our creative brand and the labels are due to arrive from the US any time soon..... she has taught me a new product line this week and here are some pics of completed ones....... hope you enjoy!
Here is to the homeward stretch....I can do this!
xxx
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Yesterday marked a really significant achievement for me as I can now say that I'm half way. YAH! I was super excited to reach this point, so I can only imagine what it will be like for me to get to Xmas when I will only have ONE to go! I will be beside myself with excitement.
We had a really good week this week and I was feeling strong; I even did 6kms at the gym on Wednesday..... and felt pretty good afterwards. Matty and I dressed up for the big milestone occasion yesterday; I wore jeans, my wig AND a hat (it's a far cry from my beautiful Alannah Hill wardrobe which has been lying dormant for the past few months but far dressier than the cargos, jumper and hat I usually cobble together) and my goal was not to cry during chemo for the first time....(trust me, that is a big goal!). Everyone in the chemo area is far older than me and we always look completely out of place when we sit there so it is rather a depressing environment.
I spent the morning creating one of my new product lines (pics below) and was totally in the creative zone. I then realised the time so raced to get my blood test before leaving for the hospital. We arrived a little late and while I had that nauseous feeling in my stomach as soon as we entered the car park, I was far more relaxed about it this time round than ever before, so I was confident I could do it without crying (and it's not just a few tears normally; it's a good 20min sob while poor Matty has to calm me down!!!). That was until the nurse put the needle into my wrist for the first time and failed..... then tried another vein in the back of my hand and failed at that too.... then I asked her if someone else could do it; seeing that she was getting stressed which was making me feel anxious! The second attempt REALLY hurt me so I didn't want her coming near me again.... thankfully she found the lovely man who usually does it for me and he got it right first go.... (thank you Ralph!) so I got through that without any tears and I was proud of myself.
I was very excited to see the first drug go into my body (it's a red liquid which instantly makes me feel terrible) for the last time....... we had a mini celebration at the end of that; there were high fives all round! Then I sat and the second drug was injected, which takes about one hour.... but boy it was a great feeling to say good riddance to these two drugs! The next four treatments will involve only one drug and it's apparently a lot easier than these ones..... a very exciting thought.
I decided to take a big dose of Grape Seed tablets before I went in yesterday and when I saw Ben (kineso) straight afterwards, he said I was much better this time than after the last chemo session...... I felt ok too as normally I get really sick very quickly... so I was hopeful! He dosed me up and I had loads of pills last night and I am feeling remarkably ok today, so I'm soooooo happy! It was definitely a good plan to take them before chemo.
My blood test results were excellent yesterday much to my delight. My white blood cells were higher than what they were before chemo 2 (4.5), so I was thrilled (also because I don't need to have the self injection this time round). My red blood cell count went down by 2-3 which is nothing, so I was also really pleased about that. It confirmed that all of my dietary changes and supplements are making a massive difference.
One of the really strange things that happened yesterday was that I have had a sore eye for the past few days. I think I was getting a bit of a sty on it, however, it was amazing that about 30mins into chemo I noticed that it had really eased and by last night it was gone! That's how powerful chemo is; it kills anything and everything inside your body!
I have such relief and hope today and I'm now past the worst of this experience...... while I've had to make massive dietary changes and really dedicate myself to getting well, it is so worth it after reaching this milestone. Not a day goes by where I don't think myself SOOOO lucky that I found Ben, my kineso, as I have no doubt that he has made a massive difference to my health and at the same time, he has been so kind and generous with his time as he has wanted me to feel better each and every day.... so for that, I am forever grateful. Like all of my specialist doctors, he is truly amazing! I am still so touched by these people who dedicate their lives to helping others. Everyone I've come into contact with (including my GP who originally diagnosed me who still calls me every few weeks) has been so kind hearted, caring and brilliant at what they do.... I'm sure it has made this journey so much easier for me....
I can also reflect at this point on all of the love and kindness from all of you; my friends, family and supporters....... there hasn't been a day where I don't get at least a few emails, texts, phone calls and I cannot tell you just how much this has boosted me each and every day.... I have never felt so loved and cherished in my life and it is so amazing to have so many beautifully kind and caring people in my life..... I haven't always had the chance to call everyone back but I really appreciate every single message; they always bring a massive smile to my face! THANK YOU and I love you all!!!
Now for the fun stuff..... Joey and I are still going strong with our creative brand and the labels are due to arrive from the US any time soon..... she has taught me a new product line this week and here are some pics of completed ones....... hope you enjoy!
Here is to the homeward stretch....I can do this!
xxx
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This was my very first tea cosie - in Xmas colours!
Head Scarf
Monday, October 11, 2010
My Naughty Little Confession
It's been a good week for me overall, with great progress being made with my kineso. I saw him on Friday and we tested a few more things.....one of which was hommus. This was a great replacement for butter on some corn bread and avocado, however, after my big sis watched Sex In the City 2 (who said SITC was not educational!!), she learnt that it contains estrogen. As my cancer was hormone/estrogen positive, this means I have had too much estrogen in my body. Sure enough, we tested it and my body went crazy with it!
Basically, it contains a natural substance called phytoestrogen, which is found in many foods, including fruit/vege/nuts etc (here is a list: http://www.dietaryfiberfood.com/phytoestrogen.php). Soy products contain the highest volumes of phytoestrogen and they are normally recommended to women to eat lots of these products to actually prevent cancer. My body however, cannot tolerate soy nor hommus (or anything with high volumes of phytoestrogen in). I am now hoping that it's only the foods with really high content levels of phytoestrogen that I cannot tolerate..... nevertheless, it felt like I'm making great progress as I was eating hommus after chemo 3, so I am hoping if I avoid any of these foods for the week, that I will feel even better next time round (yes Friday marks the half way milestone!).
My kineso mentioned that my body is super sensitive to foods and that I'm going to have to be very careful for the rest of my life.... he also mentioned that most people can eat all of these foods without any problems; these are simply the cards I've been dealt this time round...... but after a week of eating fresh food only last week, I felt great by the end of the week. While I am fully trusting what he says, I do find it difficult to rationalise as I have never felt sick or different after eating any foods and I would have said that we had a very balanced diet before all of this...so I do find that a bit strange.... but I have also seen and felt how my body now reacts to foods and it is hyper sensitive so I must listen to it!
Which brings me onto my little confession. I'm writing this entry mostly so that I can come back to it later and remember it so that I am not naughty again!
Context: so remember we are talking about a big chocolate lover here..... I used to enjoy nothing more than to indulge in a couple of pieces of beautiful dark chocolate after dinner not every night, but many nights!!! And I've been deprived of chocolate for nearly two months now.....
So I got a devine hamper brought over to me from some lovely work colleagues (it was spectacular). It was full of so much fresh fruit, tea, nuts, home made cookies and yes, home made chocolates!!! hmmmmmm They looked simply delicious and after a week of eating nothing but fruit and vegetables (you can tell where this is heading can't you?!), boy, I felt like a treat on Saturday ( don't we all deserve a treat on the wk end??!!). SO..... I thought I had better try one.... then two..... then three..... and then I stopped.... they went down a treat and I ate nothing else for the day apart from fruit and vege. Never did I dream that the impact would be noticable......(I mean they were tiny little chocolates!!)
I woke on Sunday morning feeling terrible!!! My body was struggling through the morning and I can only put it down to the chocolates..... so I learnt my lesson not to be such a little pig! I couldn't believe how bad my body felt..... so I made myself go to the gym for a walk/jog and did feel better after that and lots of water and supplements! While it was a bit of a painful lesson to learn, I now know just how sensitive my body is so I mustn't do it again.....
Apart from that, I have been feeling the best I've felt this time round. I have done lots of my creative work; I have even started knitting some funky tea cosies this week (gees, I even sound like a Nanna now!) and I have made some of my beautiful silk scarves, which I have to say I am quite proud of as they actually look nice!
We have also done some baking and found some good recipes for treats e.g. banana muffins and soy/dairy free melting moments which are delicious.
So I only have a few days to go before I'm back at the hospital and obviously dreading it. This treatment however, is the last of the worst drugs (so I'm told) so next time I will have a new drug, which is apparently a lot easier. It also marks the half way mark of chemo; yiipppeee!
I have been excited this week as we did our english family xmas draw and I noticed yesterday that the xmas shop is alive and happening in Myer.... so bring on Xmas 2010.... as it means I only have one chemo session to go....and that will be a time for celebration!
Here's to chemo session four - I am REALLY hoping that all of the progress I've made with my kineso will pay off.....and who knows, I may be even better this time than last!
xx
Basically, it contains a natural substance called phytoestrogen, which is found in many foods, including fruit/vege/nuts etc (here is a list: http://www.dietaryfiberfood.com/phytoestrogen.php). Soy products contain the highest volumes of phytoestrogen and they are normally recommended to women to eat lots of these products to actually prevent cancer. My body however, cannot tolerate soy nor hommus (or anything with high volumes of phytoestrogen in). I am now hoping that it's only the foods with really high content levels of phytoestrogen that I cannot tolerate..... nevertheless, it felt like I'm making great progress as I was eating hommus after chemo 3, so I am hoping if I avoid any of these foods for the week, that I will feel even better next time round (yes Friday marks the half way milestone!).
My kineso mentioned that my body is super sensitive to foods and that I'm going to have to be very careful for the rest of my life.... he also mentioned that most people can eat all of these foods without any problems; these are simply the cards I've been dealt this time round...... but after a week of eating fresh food only last week, I felt great by the end of the week. While I am fully trusting what he says, I do find it difficult to rationalise as I have never felt sick or different after eating any foods and I would have said that we had a very balanced diet before all of this...so I do find that a bit strange.... but I have also seen and felt how my body now reacts to foods and it is hyper sensitive so I must listen to it!
Which brings me onto my little confession. I'm writing this entry mostly so that I can come back to it later and remember it so that I am not naughty again!
Context: so remember we are talking about a big chocolate lover here..... I used to enjoy nothing more than to indulge in a couple of pieces of beautiful dark chocolate after dinner not every night, but many nights!!! And I've been deprived of chocolate for nearly two months now.....
So I got a devine hamper brought over to me from some lovely work colleagues (it was spectacular). It was full of so much fresh fruit, tea, nuts, home made cookies and yes, home made chocolates!!! hmmmmmm They looked simply delicious and after a week of eating nothing but fruit and vegetables (you can tell where this is heading can't you?!), boy, I felt like a treat on Saturday ( don't we all deserve a treat on the wk end??!!). SO..... I thought I had better try one.... then two..... then three..... and then I stopped.... they went down a treat and I ate nothing else for the day apart from fruit and vege. Never did I dream that the impact would be noticable......(I mean they were tiny little chocolates!!)
I woke on Sunday morning feeling terrible!!! My body was struggling through the morning and I can only put it down to the chocolates..... so I learnt my lesson not to be such a little pig! I couldn't believe how bad my body felt..... so I made myself go to the gym for a walk/jog and did feel better after that and lots of water and supplements! While it was a bit of a painful lesson to learn, I now know just how sensitive my body is so I mustn't do it again.....
Apart from that, I have been feeling the best I've felt this time round. I have done lots of my creative work; I have even started knitting some funky tea cosies this week (gees, I even sound like a Nanna now!) and I have made some of my beautiful silk scarves, which I have to say I am quite proud of as they actually look nice!
We have also done some baking and found some good recipes for treats e.g. banana muffins and soy/dairy free melting moments which are delicious.
So I only have a few days to go before I'm back at the hospital and obviously dreading it. This treatment however, is the last of the worst drugs (so I'm told) so next time I will have a new drug, which is apparently a lot easier. It also marks the half way mark of chemo; yiipppeee!
I have been excited this week as we did our english family xmas draw and I noticed yesterday that the xmas shop is alive and happening in Myer.... so bring on Xmas 2010.... as it means I only have one chemo session to go....and that will be a time for celebration!
Here's to chemo session four - I am REALLY hoping that all of the progress I've made with my kineso will pay off.....and who knows, I may be even better this time than last!
xx
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Diets and Chemo
Well it has been over a week since I've checked in but that simply means that I've been busy with living life in my good week; yes, lots of knitting, some sewing, lots of reading and of course socialising and having fun! (and watching the Commonwealth Games!)
It has been a great week and although we've been lying low, I have been feeling very well, strong and happy! Matty got me a book this week which is all about how to conquer cancer the natural way. I started reading it and found some interesting insights.
According to the medical professionals, I have been extremely unlucky to be diagnosed with cancer. I remember my oncologist telling me this as I was lying in my hospital bed post surgery and I was wondering whether it was something I have eaten or put into my body that has caused cancer to become active.... According to my kinesiologist, it is something I have put into my body that has caused cancer.... so there are millions of theories relating to it and why it becomes active but I am trying to keep a balanced view while doing everything I can to ensure it doesn't come back in my body......
The essence of this book is based on a Grape Diet. You should detox for 2-3 days by drinking nothing but water and then eat grapes every two hours for 10-30 days! That seems a bit too radical for me during chemo, but I have been doing a detox by eating apples during the day and veges for dinner and I have to say that I have felt SO much better. I am going to start on the grapes today but I certainly won't do it for 10 days. The idea is that you deplete your body back to nothing (it says it's good to be a skeleton basically) so that there is nothing that cancer can feed off and then build it back up with raw fresh food. I like the sound of this but while I'm dealing with chemo, I think I will tailor it to eat fresh foods only. It is amazing the difference I have felt and we have found an organic supplier of fresh food which we are going to use from here on in (http://www.wholesomeorganics.com.au/). I haven't realised just how many preservatives and unnatural ingredients are in all of our food choices until this, so it opens up an array of new opportunities for us to explore new ways of living!
I also had a great tip from a friend yesterday who no longer uses household cleaning products and instead uses vinegar and bicarb of soda; another tip we will adopt! (thanks Gail!!)
There are still so many food choices available out there and I think the soy/dairy omition will simply lead to us being healthier and happier which is great..... AND I was excited to hear about the grape diet... I will try grape juice for breaky, grapes for lunch and champas for dinner!!!! haha (I'm still not feeling like alcohol but I'm sure it won't be long!!)
So I encourage everyone to be more conscious of your food choices..... it is amazing how many cases of cancer we have heard about lately, particularly with people our age (which makes me think there has to be something we are eating or putting into our bodies), so it's really important that we do everything we can to ensure a healthy and long life......
Week two has been great and the creative activities are coming along well..... have finished a few knitting pieces this week and completed my first felting piece.... I now have some beautiful new fabrics to make some scarves with... and we are continuing to make the most of the beautiful weather we have been having by getting outdoors as much as possible!
And finally, you won't believe this but some of my hair is actually growing!!! I have sideburns to rival Matty and some of the fluff on the top of my head is growing.... and I haven't lost any other hair on my body which I have found strange! I just keep thinking that it will be the first and only time in my life that I have more hair on my legs than on my head!!!
Here's to wellness and happy living.... thank you for all of your messages of love and support!
xx
It has been a great week and although we've been lying low, I have been feeling very well, strong and happy! Matty got me a book this week which is all about how to conquer cancer the natural way. I started reading it and found some interesting insights.
According to the medical professionals, I have been extremely unlucky to be diagnosed with cancer. I remember my oncologist telling me this as I was lying in my hospital bed post surgery and I was wondering whether it was something I have eaten or put into my body that has caused cancer to become active.... According to my kinesiologist, it is something I have put into my body that has caused cancer.... so there are millions of theories relating to it and why it becomes active but I am trying to keep a balanced view while doing everything I can to ensure it doesn't come back in my body......
The essence of this book is based on a Grape Diet. You should detox for 2-3 days by drinking nothing but water and then eat grapes every two hours for 10-30 days! That seems a bit too radical for me during chemo, but I have been doing a detox by eating apples during the day and veges for dinner and I have to say that I have felt SO much better. I am going to start on the grapes today but I certainly won't do it for 10 days. The idea is that you deplete your body back to nothing (it says it's good to be a skeleton basically) so that there is nothing that cancer can feed off and then build it back up with raw fresh food. I like the sound of this but while I'm dealing with chemo, I think I will tailor it to eat fresh foods only. It is amazing the difference I have felt and we have found an organic supplier of fresh food which we are going to use from here on in (http://www.wholesomeorganics.com.au/). I haven't realised just how many preservatives and unnatural ingredients are in all of our food choices until this, so it opens up an array of new opportunities for us to explore new ways of living!
I also had a great tip from a friend yesterday who no longer uses household cleaning products and instead uses vinegar and bicarb of soda; another tip we will adopt! (thanks Gail!!)
There are still so many food choices available out there and I think the soy/dairy omition will simply lead to us being healthier and happier which is great..... AND I was excited to hear about the grape diet... I will try grape juice for breaky, grapes for lunch and champas for dinner!!!! haha (I'm still not feeling like alcohol but I'm sure it won't be long!!)
So I encourage everyone to be more conscious of your food choices..... it is amazing how many cases of cancer we have heard about lately, particularly with people our age (which makes me think there has to be something we are eating or putting into our bodies), so it's really important that we do everything we can to ensure a healthy and long life......
Week two has been great and the creative activities are coming along well..... have finished a few knitting pieces this week and completed my first felting piece.... I now have some beautiful new fabrics to make some scarves with... and we are continuing to make the most of the beautiful weather we have been having by getting outdoors as much as possible!
And finally, you won't believe this but some of my hair is actually growing!!! I have sideburns to rival Matty and some of the fluff on the top of my head is growing.... and I haven't lost any other hair on my body which I have found strange! I just keep thinking that it will be the first and only time in my life that I have more hair on my legs than on my head!!!
Here's to wellness and happy living.... thank you for all of your messages of love and support!
xx
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